The Courtship: LOOOONG DISTANCE (Part 4)

This part of our relationship is called {LONG DISTANCE}

They don’t call it long distance for nothing! That mug was looong!

Once Roger and I got our shtuff together (aka, decided to stay together and NOT break up!), we continued in the talking phase.  That is until I decided to fly to Texas for a visit.

There was much debate on this subject from my friends and roomies.  In my previous crazy relationship (less than two months that felt like two years), I was the one to fly across the country to meet the guy.  And it didn’t end well. Obvs.  Hence an end date to the relationship.

This time, with the scars of that last relationship ingrained even on their minds, they suggested I let Roger come to me.  It wasn’t a bad idea, but I wasn’t comfortable with it.

I still felt awkward about it all.  It wasn’t a full-fledge relationship, and I was worried about him coming and having forced parties with friends so they could get to know him.  I was worried about being overwhelmed by the thought of being someone’s girlfriend for the first time in my life, and it happening on home turf.  Plus, I knew who I was.  I wanted to visit him in his natural habitat so I could have a better picture of who he was.  You can say a lot on the phone and in text that maybe isn’t true.  I had been burned before, and was extremely cautious even at the thought of entering into a relationship without really knowing who he was.

Also, pre-break up, he had planned a visit to meet me, and once I ended things, I felt I owed him.  I should be the one to make the first visit.

(The pic I took from the plane before I took off for Texas.)

So I flew to Texas.  Which is a crazy story in itself–worthy of its own post.  It basically involved me renting a car and driving two hours with complete strangers. And yeah…I drove.

After the awkward first hug that was witnessed by my new stranger/friends, he took me to the hotel to check in.

We were both nervous about the visit, but him more so.  He was being awkward, and that lasted that first night and into the next day.  The awkwardness was to be expected, so I let that pass.  But on our first “date” that Friday morning to IHOP, it was clear that if he didn’t get over his nervousness, this wasn’t going to work.

He did warm up and we had normal conversations.  For the first time in 12 hours, it felt like it did over the phone, and that was nice.  It put me at ease, because it let me see that I could do this.  I could be in a relationship–a shocking revelation in and of itself.  And more importantly, I could be in a relationship with him.  Which, of course, was the whole point of the trip.  To figure out if this thing had a real shot.

It was a great first trip, filled with a forced party so his friends and coworkers could get to know me (I didn’t mind it, btw….it was fun!), several trips to the movies (again, I love movies), a day visit to his sister and brother-in-law’s house two hours away, and a Sunday worship service where I found out my man could saaaang!

It was legit.  He asked me on the Saturday night of the trip (after we got back from his sister’s) if I would be his girlfriend.

AND I FREAKED OUT!!!

Wait a second! I hadn’t had time to be a total girl and mull over whether or not we should continue the relationship in that capacity! I hated dating casually, and that’s especially hard to do long distance.  If I said yes, did that mean we were gonna get married?! I wasn’t ready for that!!!! I needed time to think about this!!!!

So naturally, after this two minute freak–out that seemed to last an eternity, and even after asking if I could wait to give him my answer, I finally said, “You know what? Yes.  I will be your girlfriend.”

(Followed by the “official” relationship pic photo shoot, and an announcement on FB! Haha.)

And the rest is, as they say, history.

HA!

Next post: Meeting my parents